The Courage to Quit: Redefining Success and Burnout
We’ve all heard it: Never give up. Push through. Hustle harder.
Especially for high-achieving women — eldest daughters, perfectionists, overachievers — quitting often feels like the one thing we’re absolutely not allowed to do. Because somewhere along the way, we learned that quitting means failure. That it means we weren’t strong enough, disciplined enough, or dedicated enough to “make it work.”
But what if that’s not true? What if quitting isn’t weakness, but a powerful act of wisdom?
Recently, I’ve been questioning the cultural obsession with grit, the constant pressure to keep going, no matter what. Inspired by Katie Williams’ How to Quit Trying, I started to wonder if the reason so many of us feel burned out isn’t because we’re weak, but because we’ve been told we’re only worthy when we don’t stop.
Why Quitting Might Be the Smartest Thing You Do
I recently made the difficult decision to let go of something I deeply cared about. It was a project I was passionate about, one I’d poured time, energy, and love into. But over time, it started to take more than it gave. It drained my energy, disconnected me from my own needs, and left me utterly exhausted.
Still, I kept going. Because quitting felt like betraying everything I said I stood for.
But the truth? I had changed. My life, my values, and my capacity had shifted, and holding on to something that no longer aligned was costing me my mental health. It was taking a toll in ways I couldn’t ignore.
So I quit.
And no, I didn’t feel immediate relief. First, I felt shame. That inner voice — the one shaped by years of perfectionism and people-pleasing — came in hot: “You’re giving up. You just needed to try harder. You’re not committed enough.”
But in that moment, I realized something powerful: our fear isn’t really about quitting itself, it’s about what we believe quitting says about us.
We’re taught that quitting means we’re unreliable. Lazy. Selfish. That we gave up too soon.
But here’s the truth: sometimes quitting is the bravest, healthiest thing you can do.
Burnout Isn’t a Badge of Honor
In today’s hustle culture, burnout is often seen as a sign of commitment, especially for female entrepreneurs and women in leadership. But the glorification of overwork is toxic. Burnout from overworking doesn’t make you more successful, it makes you more disconnected, more depleted, and more likely to lose sight of why you started in the first place.
Knowing when to quit is a skill. It’s not about giving up easily; it’s about recognizing when something is no longer aligned and having the courage to walk away.
How to Know When It’s Time to Quit
If you’re wrestling with the idea of quitting something — a job, a project, a relationship, a commitment — here are a few questions that helped me find clarity:
- Am I staying because I genuinely want to, or because I feel obligated?
- Is this giving me energy, or constantly draining me?
- If I let this go, what space could I create for something better?
- What advice would I give to a friend in my exact situation?
Your body often knows the answer before your brain does. Exhaustion. Irritability. Resentment. That subtle but persistent feeling that something is off. These are signs of misalignment, not personal failure.
And if you’ve built your identity around being the one who never quits, this decision might feel especially hard. But hard doesn’t mean wrong.
Redefining Success for Women Who Are Done With the Hustle
Let’s normalize a new kind of success, one that makes space for mental health, personal growth, and the freedom to change your mind.
If no one has told you lately, you’re allowed to quit.
You’re allowed to rest.
You’re allowed to outgrow things.
You’re allowed to choose yourself.
Quitting isn’t the opposite of trying — it’s a powerful redirection. It’s a decision to stop pouring your energy into something that’s draining you, and start investing in what actually sustains you.
Sometimes, the most productive, growth-oriented, life-giving thing you can do… is stop.
XO,
Ashley